JIMBO's FREE SEC COLLEGE FOOTBALL PICKS
"With advice this bad, you have to give it away!!!"


**************Results after Week I*************
Picked 9 out of 11 winners (Straight up) 81.82%
Picked 3 out of 11 winners (Against the Spread) 27.27%

****2013 Year End Results****
Picked 94 out of 112 winners (Straight up) 83.93%
Picked 67 out of 111 winners (Against the Spread) 60.36%

Friday, November 29, 2013

#2 Florida State Seminoles (27 pt FAV) @ Florida Gators….

Raise your tomahawks in the air and wave em around like u just don’t care!!!... Tomahawk chop chop chop!!!!....... Tomahawk chop chop chop!!!!.......... Tomahawk chop chop chop!!!!


Ohhhhhh, oh oh-uh-uh ohhhhh

Oh-uh-uh-ohhhhh

Oh-uh-uh-ohhhhh............etc. etc. etc…..

Seminoles QB Jameis Winston might be facing another rape charge after this game……With a Heisman and National Championship on the line expect Mr. Winston’s Gatorade to be spiked with Spanish fly, Viagra and some type of Low-T drug!!!...........(Compliments of Coach Jimbo Fisher’s own secret recipe!!!) I fully expect Jameis to rip off, take off, and get off on the Gator defense all day long!!!!.....In fact, after this game QB Jameis Winston may not be allowed within a 500 yards of Ben Hill Griffin Stadium!!!!! The game will start to look like a circus after halftime……………...Speaking of circus, every time Florida’s offense walks onto the field you should start to hear circus music as the clowns start to perform!!! Bottom-line, Florida is facing a drug problem this Saturday-------------yup!!!..............A drug problem!!! The Gainesville newspapers will headline Sunday morning:

“SEMINOLES DRUG THE GATORS UP-N-DOWN THE FIELD BY THEIR TAILS!!!”.......Seminoles win and cover 45-14!!!



Wake Forest Demon Deacons (14 pt DOG) @ Vanderbilt Commodores….

Someone forgot to tell the Demon Deacons they were supposed to lose last week when they played Duke!!!!……..I’m glad ole David Cutcliffe got the win but it was a super close game that never should have been!!!…..This week, Coach James Franklin will have no problem reminding the Demon Deacons that they are supposed to lose!!!..... Seniors RB Austyn Carta-Samuels, RB Wesley Tate, WR Jordan Matthews and WR Jonathan Krause have all been a huge part of something very special at Vanderbilt….Vanderbilt had never had back-to-back bowl games(this year makes 3 in-a-row!!!)…..Never has Vandy had back-to-back 9 win seasons, in fact, the only prior year they had 9 wins ever dating back to 1890 was back in 1915………….So, win this game, win their bowl game and make history again!!!..... Vandy was the whipping child for many, many years plus everyone’s homecoming-----That was the Vandy of old!!!!……….Everybody loves the underdog (including me) and it’s great to see this DOG have his day in the sun!!!!........These Seniors will not be denied!!!….Commodores win and 33-17!!!




1 Alabama Crimson Tide (10.5 pt FAV) @ #4 Auburn Tigers….

This game is going to be “part one” of a three part trilogy of the National Championship!!!!


Volume 1------The Iron Bowl Champ

Volume 2------The SEC Champ

And lastly, Volume 3---------The National Champion!!!

Bo Jackson Enterprises, Inc will be the host of this year’s main event which welcomes Bear Bryant and Company LLC to Jordan-Hare Stadium!!!.....(FYI - There really is a Bo Jackson Enterprises, Inc…loll)….We very well might be watching the national championship game this weekend at Jordan-Hare Stadium.

Here’s what’s on the line for the Tide----If AJ McCarron can win here and next week in impressive fashion; he probably wins the Heisman Trophy plus brings home Alabama’s “First Ever” three-peat National Championship!!!....If the Tigers win this Saturday, fans from Dothan to Killen will soon gather together to erect a golden calf name “GUS” and then place it at the altar of the church of Jordan-Hare!

Offensively these teams are close but I have to give the edge to Alabama’s defense….Will playing at Auburn make a difference….yes----but only on the spread!!!….The Tide wins but does not cover 24-14!!!



Georgia Bulldogs (3 pt FAV) @ Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets….

Float like a butterfly and sting like a Bee, Yellow Jackets swarming just far as you can see!!!.....That’s what I see when I look towards Atlanta!!!.....Some Georgia fans worry that their Bulldogs can’t be and won’t be two dimensional without QB Aaron Murray in the lineup!!!!…..Well folks, you heard it here first, the Bulldogs will, in fact, still be a two dimensional team going into this game!!!……Basically, it will look like this; Todd Gurley right and Todd Gurley left!!!!..........lollll………….Ok, Georgia’s in trouble!!!! Georgia Tech’s only losses this year come from teams that have QBs that are capable of putting up huge passing numbers!!! The only exception was a loss to Virginia Tech which has a TOP TEN nationally ranked defense!!!....Every run dominant team that the Yellow Jackets faced this year, were beaten handedly!!! Yellow Jackets win and pocket the Vegas points 35-28!!!




Tennessee Volunteers (4 pt FAV) @ Kentucky Wildcats….

Just in case you were wondering my loyal Kentucky Football Fans--------The men’s basketball team is now 6-1!!!!.....()………Ok, somebody has to win this football game ------right???........ Well, with these two teams, there’s a good chance that both teams could lose!!!......lolll……...I can’t beat up the Volunteers too bad because they did upset South Carolina this year, they did have a 1,000 yard rusher and they did have Vanderbilt beat last weekend but gave it away with 16 seconds left in the game!!! The Wildcats, on the other hand, manage to scare a few teams but really, the only thing that the Wildcats were able to upset this year was Coach Stoops’s stomach!!!!...Coach Stoops, my advice to you for next year--------NEXIUM!!!.........VOLs win and cover 27-21!!!




#6 Clemson Tigers (4 pt DOG) @ #10 South Carolina Gamecocks….

Clemson fans; South Carolina has just went “back2back” x2 on you!!!!......If QB Tajh Boyd doesn’t win this weekend he will go down in history as the losingest QBs to have ever played at Clemson despite the fact that he’s one of the winningest QBs to ever play at Clemson!!!…..South Carolina has never-EVER won 5 in-a-row against rival Clemson!!!…..More than just rivalry history is on the line for the Gamecocks this weekend----If Johnny Football can knock off Missouri then the Gamecocks have a date in Atlanta with Dick Satan and his team of Demon Elephants from “Tusk-aloosa”……….Should be a great game!!! QB Tajh Boyd has been awesome this year plus he just went over 3,000 yards passing for the third straight year------and QB Conner Shaw should surpass 2,000 yards passing for the first time in his career at Carolina!!!...........15 straight home wins, the Terminator playing quarterback and there’s a reason that JC is a NFL first round draft pick!!!.........These are my reasons for these two team’s seasons!!!.....Cocks win and cover 35-28!!!






#21 Texas A&M Aggies (4 pt DOG) @ #5 Missouri Tigers…..

Johnny Football come lately, the new kid in town


everybody loves you, so don't let them down!!!……The EAGLES ROCK!!!!!….Anyway, did Johnny Football let you down last weekend and did he lose his Heisman trophy last weekend???..... Johnny Football has two chances to win a Heisman, slim and none, and slim just caught a bus T-town!!!….If AJ loses to Auburn or loses in the SEC Championship game it puts the Heisman Trophy in the hands of Florida State’s QB Jameis Winston----If Winston struggles against Florida or get indicted on a possible pending rape charge then, Johnny Football has a chance.

Bottom-line: If Texas A&M wins……

If Johnny Football wins in impressive fashion he keeps his Heisman Hopes alive plus it likely places his team in the Cotton Bowl to take on the Baylor Bears!!!!…In addition, if A&M wins it automatically places the South Carolina Gamecocks into the SEC Champion game in Atlanta!!!!

Bottom-line: If the Missouri Tigers win….

If Mizzou wins they play for an SEC Champion in Atlanta….If they win the SEC Championship, they are playing for a National Championship!!!..........................Tigers win but do not cover 45-42!!!



Thursday, November 28, 2013

Ole Miss Rebels (3 pt FAV) @ Mississippi State Bulldogs….

It's the story
Of a Man name Dan
Who was bringing up three very timely QBs
All of them had helmets of gold, like their brothers,..
The youngest one might freeze!!!

Here's the story
Of a man named Hugh
Who was busy with three stars of his own
They were 4 Rebels
Playing all together
Despite they weren’t homegrown…

Then one day when Dan met this fellow
And he knew that his Bulldogs had more than a punch
That this team might somehow find a victory
That´s the way they all became the Bulldog Crunch.
The Bulldog Crunch,
The Bulldog Crunch,
That's the way they became the Bulldog Crunch.

Ok, back to realty….If Dak is out and Tyler is out then I think we all know what the most likely outcome in this game will be!!!!…..On paper the Rebels should win the game but it is a rivalry game which muddies the water!!!….The only way the Bulldogs can beat Ole Miss is if the defense holds Ole Miss to 14 points or less….The Bulldogs “WILL NOT” win if they get into a shootout with Bo Wallace with freshman QB Damian Williams under center …..The Bulldog’s Gold Chrome Domes will be shining at Scott Field on Thanksgiving night in Stark-Vegas but it doesn’t negate the fact that the Bulldogs are starting an inexperienced freshman QB….Rebels win and cover 24-14!!! (And for the record, I hope I’m completely wrong!!!)



Arkansas Razorbacks (25 pt DOG) @ #17 LSU Tigers….

“Less” Miles, the most hated man in Baton Rouge!!!.....Sorry LSU fan, you can’t get rid of Les because he keeps on winning!!!.....(You poor thing)..... Arkansas’s Bret Bielema is only a cheeseburger shy of matching the glory years of Coach Jack Crowe!!!....(That 3-9 record awaits you----Ouch!).....The Razorback for some strange reason give the Bayou Bengals fits…..The 4-8 Razorbacks last year came within a touchdown of upsetting 10-2 LSU….That will not be the case this year…Despite how bad things were at Arkansas last year it did not remove the fact that they still had an NFL caliber QB, by the name Tyler Wilson, reading the defenses and pulling the trigger!!!!…. (He’s now an Oakland Raider, just in case you were wondering!!!) Tyler Wilson had a career day with over 359 yards passing--------Don’t expect that same performance from Arkansas’s QB Brandon Allen!!!…But, you can expect LSU’s QB Zach Mettenberger to have a career day!!! Zach is just shy of 3,000 yards for the season which would be his best year at LSU….Expect him to be on fire this game!!!……..In fact, there’s a good chance that the scoreboard catches on fire too!!!...........Bayou Bengals win and cover 42-14!!!




Friday, November 22, 2013

Game Schedule Nov. 23rd Central Times

Game Schedule    Time      TV     XM    Sirius

Miss ST @ Ark    11:00    SECTV   196    134
Coastal @ S Car  12:00    ppv     200     93
Chatt @ Alabama   1:00    ppv     201    117
GA. SO @ Florida  1:00    ppv     198    128
T.A&M @ LSU       2:30    CBS      91     91
KY @ Georgia      6:00    ESPNU   200     93
Vandy @ Tenn      6:00    ESPN2   199    128
Mizzou @ Ole Miss 6:45    ESPN     85     85     

Mississippi State Bulldogs (1.5 pt FAV) @ Arkansas Razorbacks….

Bulldog fans came within a gnat’s ass of trading in them old 1980’s “MSU 6 - Bama 3” t-shirts for a brand new t-shirt that reads “MSU 21- Bama 20”!!!....Bully put up a hellva fight but in the end Dan Mullen had to break out his pooper scooper; bag it, trash it and move on!!!…..Here’s the percentage breakdown on this week’s game: If QB Dak Prescott can play at 80% (elbow) then the Bulldogs have about 75% of winning this game…..If QB Tyler Russell can play at 80% (shoulder/arm) then the Bulldogs have about 50% of winning this game…..and if the third string QB Damian Williams has to play at 80%(knee) then the Bulldogs have about 25% of winning this game!!!.....Now, if you’re a Razorbacks fan then it’s real simple; Offensively the Razorbacks have to establish the run with Collins, Williams and/or Marshall in order to create big-easy-open passing lanes for QB Brandon Allen….And on the defensive side of the ball, all the Hawgs really need to do to stop the Bulldogs is to stop their passing game. Without Dak Prescott in the line up the Bulldogs become too one dimensional…I think Dak Prescott will “NOT” be able to play this weekend but Tyler Russell will be able to play!!!......Bulldogs win and cover 28-24!!!

Coastal Carolina Chanticleers (34.5 pt DOG) @ #11 South Carolina Gamecocks….

First off I would like to give a shout out to Carolina’s kicker, Elliott Fry, for winning the game last week against the Gators….The 145 pound soaking-wet kicker took over in the fourth quarter by hitting a 22 and 43 yard field goal to win the game….Fry may be small and can only bench press the “bar” but he‘s definitely this week’s “BMOC” (Big Man On Campus!!!)……………Now, on to this week’s matchup!!!!
If KFC’s Colonel Sanders were alive-n-kicking today he would be headin’ to Williams-Brice Stadium to watch this game!!!(No pun intended)……Coastal Carolina is 10-1 and South Carolina is 8-2!!!….And just for the record, a chanticleer is a fancy, literary name for a rooster….And a Gamecock is, basically, a fancy way of saying; “tough-ass” killer cock that ain‘t chicken!!!……Speaking of “tough-ass” cock, South Carolina has one of the toughest Cocks around and he goes by the name Colonel Shaw, I mean Conner Shaw!!!….And when Conner Sanders, I mean Conner Shaw has his offense “shaking-n-baking”; it feels like all them "Eleven Herbs and Spices "on the field can’t be beat!....Lastly, I don’t want to seem too Cocky about this Carolina defense but I think they’re good enough to force this 10-1 Coastal Carolina team into laying a goose egg!!!(Or a Chanticleer egg, if you prefer!!!) Gamecocks win and cover 42-0!!!

Georgia Southern Eagles (27.5 pt DOG) @ Florida Gators….Them Florida Gators

chewed-n-chomped on Carolina’s Cocks pretty good last weekend!!!!…….I bet all them trainers at South Carolina were busy this week washing socks and icing Cocks!!!…..Last weekend, the Gators almost ended South Carolina’s home game winning streak at Williams-Brice Stadium along with any hopes of an SEC title.….The Gators completely stopped the running game of Davis & Shaw plus in the first half the Gators bite off one of Conner Shaw’s arms so he couldn‘t pass in the second half!!!!…..But, being true to form, the Terminator, CONNERS, SARAH CONNERS??? CONNER, Conner Shaw, grew back his arm during halftime, just in time, to throw a 32yard TD strike to Bruce Ellington on the Gamecock’s opening drive in the second half!!!……And as they say---The rest is history!!!….The Gators showed a lot of heart last week despite a lack luster 4-6 season……….But, this week the Gators get a chance to be productive on the scoreboard against a weaker Southern Conf opponent!!!!..........The 6-4 Eagles, definitely, aren’t going to be a pushover but I do expect the Gator defense to find the endzone just as much as their offense this week! Gators win and cover 35-7!!!

Chattanooga Mocs (49 pt DOG) @ #1 Alabama Crimson Tide….

The “Mocs” formerly the “Moccasins” moved away from the Native American Indian imagery to a more menacing creature------The Mockingbird!!!.....yeaaaaaaaa, ok!!!.......The P.C. police strike again!!!
The only thing this bird from Chattanooga will be mocking this weekend is the Great Native American Hoot Owl!!!.... I can hear it now------Chattanooga’s secondary saying-------” Whoooo-Whoooo, who’s man was that that just scored?”…Or maybe it’s Chattanooga's linebackers’ saying---“Whoooo-Whoooo, Who just ran over me?”…....And of course, “To kill a Mockingbird” is, definitely, going to be a required reading for all the Bama players this week!!!!.....I fully expect everyone to make an A+ if they really really study hard!!!…..But, don’t be surprised if you see Little Nicky Saban passing around the cliff note version to his starters this week!!!…He needs them to be healthy as they can be before heading into Auburn to take on the Tigers in the 2013 Iron Bowl next week!!!....Bama’s offense played bad enough to lose last week against Miss State, but luckily for them the depleted Bulldog offense just couldn’t capitalize!!! Alabama’s offense will not struggle this week……Tide wins but does not cover 56-7!!!

#12 Texas A&M Aggies (5 pt DOG) @ #22 LSU Tigers…

Folks, if you haven’t watched “The Johnny (Football) Manziel Show” the past two seasons then you don’t know what you’ve missed……Johnny Football might be more entertaining to watch than Uncle Si on Duck Dynasty!!!......(Ok, now I’m just talking crazy!!!....loll)…..But, with only two more episodes left in this football season the grand finale is gonna be more hyped than the final episode of the “Sopranos”. Johnny Manziel is trying to pull the “repeat” on the Heisman Trophy and needs a huge stage to pull it off!!!….Well, sports fans; the stage is set!!! (7-3 LSU this week and 9-1 Missouri the last week----both games are on the road!!!)……… Johnny Football must win the next two games in impressive fashion to secure the Heisman Trophy……One thing I have noticed about Johnny Football over the past two years is his uncanny ability to play “lights out” under the lights!!!…..In fact, the brighter, the hotter the spot light, the more he shines!!!!..... So, what does it take to win a Heisman Trophy back to back???......Tune in and watch for yourself!!!!...Expect to see Johnny “Be Money” Football the next two weeks and pick up his second Heisman in New York City!!!....Aggies win and keep the points in their pocket 45-42!!!

Kentucky Wildcats (23.5 pt DOG) @ Georgia Bulldogs….

Anybody catch that boring Auburn-Georgia game last week….lollll……Ouch!!!….Ok, Georgia fans will be cryin’ over that loss for many generations to come!!!!......That 73 yard touchdown pass was pure “pain” and “awesomeness” all rolled up into one!!!....As the old saying goes----“You better get you head out of your a$$ quickly or it might happen again!!!”……….This “Win” starved Kentucky Wildcat team is primed and ready to sucker punch any “down-in-the-dumps” football team that isn’t paying attention to them. The Dawgs may not be playing for a National Championship or even an SEC Championship but they still have a lot to be playing for….QB Aaron Murray will likely end his career as is the most prolific passer in SEC history. He has broken so many National and SEC records that the list are too long to name them all……The “Top Three” records for me this year were the following: career passing yards(13,000 and counting), career TD passes (117 and counting) and my personal favorite ---Murray has passed for more than 3,000 yards for 4 straight years !!!(No other QB in the SEC history has ever passed for 3,000 yards for even 3 three straight years!!!!)....Factor in bigger bowl game, last home game and a healthier Gurley; you should see a big win for the Dawgs this Saturday!!!.......Dawgs win and cover 45-20!!!

Vanderbilt Commodores (2.5 pt DOG) @ Tennessee Volunteers….

When was the last time the Commodores beat the Volunteers two years in a row????...........1926!!!
That was the year Dr. Robert Goddard launched his 1st liquid fuel rocket and it went up into the air 184' (+/- 62 yards…..loll)…….BTW- he’s the founding father of the modern day rocket “OR” the guy that paved the way for you to watch 10 football games all at once on your TV, talk on your cell phone, surf the internet, look at the top of your house on Google maps, etc., etc., etc…….Let’s just say satellite technology and the Vanderbilt football team have both come a long way!!!!.....Vandy is already Bowl eligible and just looking to add the whipping cream and chocolate sprinkles to an already tasty season!!! Tennessee, on the other hand, finds themselves in a “must-win” situation and will need to win the last two games against Vanderbilt and Kentucky just to become Bowl eligible…..It’s not goin’ to be easy but it’s doable!!!The Commodores have only won 3 times in Neyland Stadium in the past 75yrs……So, the Volunteers have history on their side…..This game is goin’ be a huge fight within the state of Tennessee with a lot of high school recruits watching on……Because of this, plus pride, the VOLS will not go gently into the night!!!…The ‘Dores will have to earn this one!!!….Commodores win and cover 31-28!!!

Missouri Tigers (2.5 pt FAV) @ #24 Ole Miss Rebels….

Are you ready? Hell yeah! Damn Right! Hotty Toddy, Gosh almighty. Who the hell are we, Hey! Flim Flam, Bim Bam GAMECOCKS BY DAMN!!!.......There may be more Ole Miss Rebel fans sitting in Williams-Brice Stadium than there are in Vaught-Hemingway Stadium this Saturday!!!.......Missouri has already lost to South Carolina…..So if Mizzou falls to either Ole Miss or to Johnny Football next week then the Gamecocks get there tickets punched for a showdown with Alabama in SEC Championship game in Atlanta (assuming Auburn doesn’t beat Bama next week!!!!)…..Ole Miss has a 9-3 season right in the middle of their crosshairs…. If they can play their cards right over the next two weeks they may find themselves tanning in Florida on New Year’s Day!!!……But first they have to get past the Tigers!!! Missouri is for real!!!....I was “slow to roll” with the Mizzou Train but after their Florida game, I knew!!! They have two super QBs, tons of experience playing together and the third best defense in the SEC(Only Florida and Bama’s defense is statistically better)….and ohhhh, did I mention they have an NFL first round draft pick playing on defense who’s leading the SEC in sacks…..Everyone “woos-n-coos” over the Tiger’s defense but it’s their defense that impress me the most…..Ole Miss has to establish a running game against the Tigers….If they don’t, it will force Hugh Freeze into a passing frenzy which plays into the hands of the Missouri defense …..If Bo Wallace has more than 30+ pass attempt in this game, statistically, the Rebels are going to have turnovers against the Missouri defense. Defensive End Michael Sam has been pressuring QBs into bad throws all year plus he leads the SEC in sacks!!!…….I think “Sam I am” continues to eat QBs like “green eggs-n-ham”…….Tigers win and cover 41-34!!!

Friday, November 15, 2013

Game Schedule Nov. 16th Central Times

Game Schedule    Time      TV     XM    Sirius

Troy @ Ole Miss   11:00    ESPNU   199    112
Kentucky @ Vandy  11:21    SECTV   200    139
Georgia @ Auburn   2:30      CBS    91     91
Florida @ S Car.   6:00    ESPN2    85     85
Alabama @ Miss ST  6:45     ESPN   198    108

Troy Trojans (28.5 pt DOG) @ Ole Miss Rebels….

America's #1 most trusted name is TROJANS!!!!.....Well, maybe it’s; Troy’s #1 most trusted name is Trojans when it comes to football!!!.....Either way, the Trojans are heading out and coming to Oxford! The Trojans have lost 4 very close games in the 4th quarter this year…..Basically they’ve had 4 wins within reach but just couldn’t pull it out in the 4th quarter!!! This 5-5 Troy football team has been up and down, up and down all season!!! Troy’s offensive line has been effective in protection but their coverage in the secondary has been suspect and ineffective all year. If I were Troy’s coach Larry Blakeney I wouldn’t and couldn’t trust my secondary to stop the Big Bo Wallace’s long ball and deep threat!!!…Bo Wallace is probably going to have Trojans in his face all night long but it won’t matter with all those big body wide receivers to throw to; Ja-Mes Logan, Donte Moncrief and Laquon Treadwell….All Bo Wallace needs to do is get the ball out of the pocket and he’ll score!…Rebels win but do not cover 49-21!!!

Kentucky Wildcats (12.5 pt DOG) @ Vanderbilt Commodores….

I’ve been raggin’ on the Wildcat’s football team a little this year….Even talked about how good the basketball team was doing during the middle of football season!!!!…Well, it looks like the Wildcat’s basketball team wanted to show some support for their football team this week…..So, in an effort to show some “respect” and “down play” some of their own success, the Wildcat basketball team lost to Michigan State Tuesday night just to make the football team feel better about themselves!!!...lolll...Now, Vanderbilt on the other hand, appeared to take Florida to the wood shed last weekend by beating the Gators 34-17. But when you look at the game closer, it was glaring obvious that the Gators died of a self-inflicted football wound to the head by turning the ball over 4times!!!…..None-the-less this victory was a signature win for the coach James Franklin and for the Commodores football program!!!...The Wildcats are now standing in the way of the Commodores becoming bowl eligible….So, don’t expect Vandy to pull a Vandy this week!!! Commodores win and cover 35-21!!!

#25 Georgia Bulldogs (3.5 pt DOG) @ #7 Auburn Tigers….

Georgia and Auburn are gonna be fightin’ like Cats and Dawgs this weekend!!!....Most people assume that the Dawg always win!!!...But when the Cat is a Tiger and the Dawg is the DOG then all that logic goes out the window!!!……Georgia’s Aaron Murray & Todd Gurley and Auburn’s Nick Marshall & Tre Mason won’t be the keys to victory in this game. The key to victory in this game is DEFENSE and which one can slow down the other team’s play makers!!!…..Both Georgia and Auburn won’t have problems scoring TDs this weekend!!!! But with Georgia’s injury list continuing to grow, I don’t see them getting any better this week!!!Auburn, on the other hand, has continued to improve each week on offense and defense!!!…..Look to see the Tigers improvement again this week!!!…..Tigers win and cover 35-28!!!

Florida Gators (13.5 pt DOG) @ #10 South Carolina Gamecocks….

Of course cockfighting is now a banned sport in the US but many people still love to raise and train Fighting Roosters to spar. One technique that coaches/trainers love to use to motivate or aggravate a rooster into fighting is to blow cold air up the rooster’s butt---- (Ummmm, Ok, that kinda got my feathers ruffled up just thinking about it!!!!)…..Pretty sure that Steve Spurrier wont’ be using this technique this weekend in order to get his Gamecocks fired up to fight the Florida Gators!!!!.....Well, he might want to bring a leaf blower just in case Clowney gets tired in the 4th quarter!!!......Florida’s offense, on the other hand, was having trouble scoring points against Vanderbilt and Georgia’s defense over the past two weeks. They are in for a rude awakening this weekend!!!.........But, If you see Florida’s coach Will Muschamp on the sideline standing behind his Gator offensive line trying to blow out the candles on his birthday cake (and there’s no birthday cake) then you know what’s going on!!!
Cocks win and cover 35-20!!!

#1 Alabama Crimson Tide (26 pt DOG) @ Mississippi State Bulldogs….

1st meeting of Bama and State goes back to Nov. 14th, 1896!!! (117 yrs ago!!!)….....Alabama won 20-0!!! Not much has changed since then; Bama had a great defense and State had a bad offense!!!
Its 1980……John Bond is the QB for Miss State………Emory Bellard is the new coach for the Bulldogs!!! Bear Bryant is riding a 28 game winning streak and just won the last two national championships!!! Bama is 7-0, ranked #1 in the country and heading to Mississippi to take on the Bulldogs of Miss State!!!!........Final score 6-3--------Bulldogs win!!!!...That may have been the biggest upset win in Bulldog history!!! UNLESS!!!---The Bulldogs decide to “repeat the feat” this year!!!....Ok, reality check!!!Miss State finished 9-3 in 1980(MSU is sitting at 4-5), John Bond was healthy (Dak Prescott’s elbow is about to fall off) and the Bulldogs were only a 19 point underdog!!!(Bully is being spotted 26 this year) Needless to say Miss State should lose the game but people keep buying lottery tickets too!!!!........A lot of these Bulldog players didn’t get offers from Bama so they will come into this game with a chip on their shoulder!!!! Expect to see the “Pit-bull” in Bully this weekend!!!!.......(Snap Snap!!!)The Tide wins but does not cover 38-14!!!

Monday, November 11, 2013

Vanderbilt Commodores (10.5 pt DOG) @ Florida Gators….

When the Commodores come ashore at BEN HILL GRIFFIN STADIUM in search of Gator hides, they will be in for a rude awakening when they realize how ineffective their offensive weapons are at penetrating the tough skin of this Gator defense!!!!.....Al-the-Gator will greet them, eat them, and poop them all in one hello/good bye!!!!.......This will be the best defense that the Commodores have faced all year long!!! They might not score more than 17points in this game!!!!……Of course with Florida’s offense that might be all they need to score!!!!......Florida’s inconsistency from QB Tyler Murphy opens the door for Vanderbilt to pull the upset; so Murphy must score three times in order for the Gators to have a chance at winning this game!!!......That’s definitely going to happen against this porous Vanderbilt defense!!! Gators win but do not cover 27-17!!!

#8 Missouri Tigers (14 pt FAV) @ Kentucky Wildcats….

The Kentucky Wildcats come into this football game undefeated on the year!!!!……..Well, kind of,,,,,,The Kentucky Wildcats “basketball team” is undefeated on the year and some of the basketball players will come into the Stadium to watch this football game!!!!!(So, technically,,,,,,,,,lollll)….The Tigers of Missouri are for real!!!!.....To better help you Kentucky fans understand what’s going to happen to you this weekend; let’s me put it in Kentucky terms!!!! Expect Mizzou’s QB Maty Mauk to drain 6 pointers from the 50yard line!!!! Also, there’s a running back named Henry Josey from Missouri that runs well…..or as I like to call him----Josey runs Wale!!!....How well does Josey run???...When he carries players on his back he calls it the “Missouri Boat Ride”!!!...So, all the “Blue Legs” dress appropriately and don’t fall off!!! This game stays close for 3 quarters then Kentucky falls into the river…..Tigers win and cover 38-17!!!

#9 Auburn Tigers (7 pt FAV) @ Tennessee Volunteers….

The Volunteers got ducked up by a Duck from Oregon, got chomped on by a Gator from Gainesville, got nipped in the rear by a Bulldog from Athens, got carried out to sea by the Tide from Alabama and got scratched to death by a Kitty Kat from Missouri!!!....... Volunteers!!!-----You should not have volunteered for this game!!!...Auburn’s RB Tre Mason is my “break out” player of the year and Gus Malzahn is my SEC coach of the year!!!! ....Tennessee you couldn’t stop the run last week and you surely won’t be able to stop this train from Auburn!!!………All Auburn needs to do to win this game is feed Tre Mason the ball over and over again and then occasionally let QB Nick Marshall stretch the field and find wide-open WRs!!!!…………The Auburn wide receivers should be so open after the Volunteers have to load the box in an attempt to stop Tre Mason that even Tennessee’s QB Justin Worley would be able to hit them!!! Tigers win and cover 31-21!!!

Arkansas Razorbacks (17 pt DOG) @ Ole Miss Rebels….

It’s going to look like Christmas in Oxford, MS this weekend with all the snow and ice I’m predicting!!! It’s gonna get cold, real cold---------in fact--------It’s gonna be” FREEZING” in Oxford this weekend!!!! (Hugh Freezing………..)With all those lights lit up on the scoreboard; Don’t be surprised if you start to hear Ole Miss fans singing “O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree” in November!!! The “Big Man” in the “Big Red” suit, Bo Wallace, will be sending his team of reindeer down the field all night long………..
“Now, Treadwell! Now, Sanders! Now, Logan! and Collins Moore!!!
On, Moncrief! On, Dodson! On Holder! and Kailo Moore!!!”
Coach Bret Bielema, who resembles the “Heat Miser”, will be hotter than hell (pun intended) by the 4th quarter after Coach Hugh “Freeze Miser” finishes pelting him with all those big snowy footballs!!!!! But, you want to know what’s impressive about this Arkansas team??? The Razorback’s have a true Freshman RB Alex Collins who’s only 79 yards short of hitting a 1000yards rushing!!!!……You want to know what’s more impressive than that????……. The Razorback’s have another RB by the name of Jonathan Williams that could hit a 1000 yards rushing too!!!...........Williams needs 284 yards with three games to go!!!......Needless to say, Arkansas plans on running the football!!!!........On the other side of the ball, the Rebels get defensive lineman Robert Nkemdiche back which should help to offset some of the Arkansas running game….The Razorbacks will manage to avoid the “Freezer Burn” during the first half but they won’t escape the avalanche in the 2nd half!!!!.....Rebels win but do not cover 35-24!!!

Appalachian State Mountaineers (40 pt DOG) @ Georgia Bulldogs….

Remember when the Appalachian State Mountaineers rolled into the BIG HOUSE and upset the Michigan Wolverines????….Yeaaaaaaa, this ain’t that team!!!....Expect to see Gurley at 75% and Murray at 100%!!!.....Georgia needs to put away App State quickly in order to get Gurley off the field quickly!!! The Dawgs will need Gurley at 100% before they roll into Jordan-Hare next weekend if they have any plans of upsetting Auburn at home!!!...........Dawgs win but do not cover 49-10!!!

Mississippi State Bulldogs (20 pt DOG) @ #15 Texas A&M Aggies….

Dak Prescott lost more than a game this past weekend. He lost his mother, Peggy Prescott, to colon cancer.….Might we all take a moment to send up a prayer and much love to the Prescott family………..Her benefit page on facebook is called “Huddle Up 4 Cancer” if you want to check it out. Dak Prescott’s 12 TDs is currently tied for 2nd place in the SEC for total touchdowns scored this season. The person he’s tied with just happens to be Aggies WR Mike Evans!!!….A&M’s QB Johnny Football is the leader in the SEC with 2,867 total yards passing….He’s also the leader in the SEC for total touchdowns passes with 26!!!…..But, Johnny Manziel and Dak Prescott’s rushing yards are virtually the same with Prescott holding a slight edge with 568 yards and 10 rushing TDs to Manziel’s 564 yards and 8 rushing TDs!!!!.....People really don’t realize how good Dak Prescott’s numbers are this year!!!....Football games are full of statistics, emotions and twists-n- turns-----And nobody does stats, twists-n-turns and stirs emotions better than Johnny Football!!!............Johnny Football will be “Money”----------AGAIN, this weekend!!!! The Bulldogs will want to show up and play “inspired” football but I’m afraid they'll show up and play “emotionally drained” football...Aggies win but do not cover 49-31!!!

#13 LSU Tigers (12 pt DOG) @ #1 Alabama Crimson Tide….

My daddy use to always tell me; Son, never mess with a herd of Elephants in Elephant country or you might get stepped on!!!.....or was it; Boy, you better stop doing that or you’ll go blind!!!.…...I can’t remember,,,,,,, but if I were an Elephant from Tuscaloosa, I bet my memory would have no problem remembering what LSU did to me in 2011!!!.....In 2011, the Tigers beat the Tide in T-town by a score of 9-6 in OT which eventually lead to a repeat game with LSU in the national championship!!! Alabama did end up beating LSU in the National Championship game……But they almost lost their chance to even play for a National Championship because of that loss to LSU!!!......Coach Dick Satan will not want history to repeat itself, and I’m positive he’s using that old game film as a reminder of the national champion that almost didn’t happen!!!!......Expect Alabama’s defense and RB Kenyan Drake to dominate this game!!!
Tide wins and covers 31-17!!!

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Game Schedule Nov 9th Central Times

          Game           Time      TV     XM  Sirius

Auburn @ Tenn      11:00  ESPN   91      91
Vandy @ Florida    11:00  FSN    200     108
Mizzou @ Kentucky  11:00  ESPNU  201  119
Ark @ Ole Miss     11:21  SECTV  199    112
APP ST @ Georgia   11:30  N/A     198    135
Miss ST @ Texas AM  2:30  CBS    200  108
LSU @ Alabama       7:00  CBS     91        91

Friday, November 1, 2013

Game Schedule Nov 2 Central Times

  Game                             Time   TV    XM  Sirius

Miss ST @ S Carolina 11:21  SECTV  200  157 
Florida @ Georgia     2:30  CBS     91   91
Auburn @ Arkansas     5:00  ESPN2  201  112
Tennessee @ Mizzou    6:00  ESPN   198  137
Al ST. @ Kentucky     6:30  CSS    200  157
UTEP @ Texas A&M      8:00  ESPN   199   93

Mississippi State Bulldogs (13 pt DOG) @ #14 South Carolina Gamecocks…

Well, it looks like South Carolina fans are just putting the finishing touches on the “Golden Calve” they built this week………..Couldn’t help but notice that the statute sure does look like QB Conner Shaw!!! Just in case you haven’t heard or live on the Moon, Conner Shaw (aka Little Lazarus) brought the whole Gamecock team back from death last week in order to secure a win over the Missouri Tigers!!!….With that win Conner Shaw carved his name in the memory of thousands of Gamecock fans!!!!….What he did at Missouri will be legendary and remembered for many years to come….So, what did the Bulldogs do last week worth remembering-------------Well, they beat an SEC team!!!..... Not sure how they played in the second half against Kentucky is worth remembering, might be worth forgetting, but they won!!!.......QB Dak Prescott and WR Jameon Lewis are State’s only offensive weapons. For Miss State to win, these two would both have to have career games on the same day and Conner Shaw and Mike Davis need to have their worst game of the season plus State’s defense would have to limit Carolina to 21 pts or less to get the win….That’s not going to happen this week at William Brice Stadium in Columbia, SC where the Gamecocks have a 14 game winning streak going!!!...........Cocks win but do not cover 31-21!!!

Georgia Bulldogs (2.5 pt FAV) @ Florida Gators….

Ray Charles may be singing “GEORGIA ON MY MIND!!!”.........But, Mark Richt is singing Georgia’s Todd Gurley on mind!!!……….”The World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party” will once again take place in Jacksonville, FL this weekend but the question everyone wants to know is; is Todd Gurley playing this weekend and will he be 100%???......I’m betting on Gurley’s return this week….Without Todd Gurley in the mix, QB Aaron Murray has to do too much which makes the Georgia offense way too predictable. With a healthy Todd Gurley, Georgia’s offense runs like a well-oiled machine…..On the other side of the ball; Florida’s offense is really struggling and now the defense is starting to struggle with all the injuries. This was obvious in the Missouri game and has since worsened. With Todd Gurley back in the mix, QB Aaron Murray’s passing lanes should quickly turn into 8-lane freeways!!!....Dawgs win and cover 34-27!!!

#11 Auburn Tigers (7.5 pt FAV) @ Arkansas Razorbacks….

Everyone knows Arkansas Coach Bret Bielema and Auburn coach Gus Malzahn kind of have a miniature feud going on between them------Bielema was very vocal this summer about Malzahn’s “Hurry Up” offense increases football injuries and Malzahn, of course, disagrees with him!!!….Gus Malzahn apparently knows how to coach football but doesn’t know how to make a copy of a DVD. Coaches traditional swap game film with the opposing coaches the week before a game in order to study each other….Well, Bret Bielema accused Malzahn of purposely deleting some of the Auburn plays from the game film that he sent him….............lollll Needless to say, Bret and Gus don’t hang-out on weekends!!! Well, actually they will be hanging out together this weekend at Razorback Stadium in Fayetteville, AR!!!......The Razorbacks have Alex Collins and play good defense!!!….Auburn has Tre Mason, Cameron Artis-Payne, Jay Prosch, Nick Marshall, and Jeremy Johnson and the play good defense-----plus, they run the “Hurry Up” offense!!!......Razorbacks will hang tough but in the end----Tigers win and cover 31-21!!!

Tennessee Volunteers (10.5 pt DOG) @ #9 Missouri Tigers….

Elvis Presley loved football and the Cleveland Browns were his favorite NFL team….Not sure who his favorite college team was but if you asked him what he thought about Tennessee football he would have probably said the following:
“You ain't nothin' but a hound dog
Cryin' all the time.
Well, you ain’t never caught a runnin’ back
And you ain't no defense of mine!!!
When they said you recruited high class,
Well, that was just a lie.
You ain't never caught a pass
And you ain't no offense of mine!!!”
Ok, I’m not exactly sure that’s what he would say,,,,,,, but it sure sounded good!!!.......lolllll......As far as Missouri goes, well, do you remember the Star Wars sequel-----“The Empire Strikes Back!” Last week, Missouri fans got to watch the end of the Conner Shaw sequel---“The Endzone Strikes Back!” With The Tigers still sitting in the driver’s seat controlling their own destiny, look for them to rebound against the VOLS in a big way this weekend at Faurot Field in Columbia….Tigers win and cover 42-27!!!

Alabama State Hornets (27.5 pt DOG) @ Kentucky Wildcats….

HEY KENTUCKY, YOU GET TO WIN THIS WEEK!!!!.....You’re actually a 4 touchdown favorite to win!!!.....Ummmmmmm, try not to blow it, will you!!!....It’s getting harder and harder to find something good to say about the Kentucky football team….But, there is one impressive thing I do like about where this Kentucky football program is today, and that is; the football program and practice fields are literally within walking distance to Rupp Arena!!!!...lolll….Ok, my bad!!!!.......As far as the Hornets go, the upside looks like this; they are 6-2 and one of the better teams in the SWAC plus they’re competing for the elusive prestige SWAC Championship this year!!! (Insert sacrum)…........The downside is; they’re in the SWAC..............And unfortunately they’re getting ready to go 6-3!!!
Wildcats win and cover 42-14!!!

UTEP Miners (47 pt DOG) @ #12 Texas A&M Aggies….

Just FYI----UTEP stands for the University of Texas El Paso!!!...UTEP will be heading to Texas A&M this weekend to take on the legend of Johnny Football….It’s a good thing that UTEP chose Miners as their mascot because they will probably be buried alive by halftime and will need to tunnel themselves back to El Paso!!! ….Just like so many miners of the past, these Miners for UTEP have “Gold Fever” too and truly expect to find fame and fortune in grass fields of College Station…But, what they find instead is Johnny Football making “Fool’s Gold” of the Miners defense!!!…..Expect Manziel to use his dynamite moves and explosive offensive play to move some earth and blow up the score board!!!….Manziel will have blisters on his finger tips from making the “money sign” by the 3rd quarter!!!!!......So, you better catch the first half if you want to see Johnny “Be Money”…. Aggies win but don’t cover 56-13!!!
 
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